I don't want to, but

I simply must. I don't know why I'm being so difficult. I feel like I'm outside of myself and I really want to just make myself behave, to shake me or something, wake myself up. I've been sitting in front of my computer since 1:30 this afternoon, and I've only added a little over a thousand words and two and a half paragraphs. I haven't gotten to the end of the introduction yet! Granted, I'm working on the last paragraph, and once I've banged it out, my introduction is pretty fucking fabulous, if I do say so myself. But still. An introduction does not a graduate thesis make. It helps, yes. And I've incorporated a lot more theory into the introduction, which is definitely good. I know where I'm going, I just have to get there. And it's four o'clock in the morning, and part of me just wants to crawl in bed and try to get up at a reasonable hour tomorrow, but I know perfectly well that I wouldn't be able to fall asleep and I will probably get up around 2pm (como siempre), and I want to do this, I want to write this. I have to admit here that I'm pretty impressed with myself, actually. But I sort of feel like this is contributing to my paralysis. That doesn't even remotely make sense. Except it does. Perhaps I will explore that at a later time. I have a thesis to write.

Update: It is now 5:30am, and I just realized that I have added five pages somehow. This is including the bibliography, but still. I've added four pages of text. Not bad. I just began reworking the Pale Fire section, but it's going to be a big job, so I'm going to put it away for the night. And tomorrow, I'm... well, we'll see what happens. No promises. Not making a promise saves me from breaking it. Down to the wire for real this time. Bed time. Lovely.